80's horror film reviews: Friday the 13th: The New Blood

This is, hands down, the best friday the 13th movie ever! You may think it's a little cheesy but you can look past that. I'm mean hey it was the 80's. And this was a slasher movie of the 80's.
So the story begins with Tina, a sullen teenager who goes to a camp retreat(you know what) with her mother while still having conflicting memories about her deceased father. On that faithful night when Tina was a little girl, she witnessed her parents fighting resulting her father of hitting her mother. Upset by the outburst, Tina runs out to the boat while her father pleads for forgiveness. Then something strange happens. As young Tina gets angrier, the poles underneath the pier her father is standing at, begins to move. When the poles finally break, Tina's father drown deep into the water. Now all grown up with that guilt still clinging to her, it's not too early to reveal that Tina have telekinetic powers. Tina and her mother on their way to meet the slimy Dr. Cruise, who only wants Tina to showcase her telekinetic powers for his own benefit. Meanwhile, a couple of dumb teens are there: You have the hunky, sensitive Nick, who turns out to be our hero, Melissa, the rich bitch, The cute nerd Eddie, there's also the smart but funny Maddie, and what ever teen slasher stereotypical characters that you see. So one night while sitting on the pier of that fatal memory, Tina uses her powers to resurrected her father. But something dosen't seem right. Tina brings back something else....something else bad......You know who it is folks. And off Jason goes to kill a whole batch of teens, including that asshole Dr. Cruise.
What makes it so great is the story with a great pace to go with it. The action of it all just keeps the movie going. The character of Tina is quite captivating, I mean having a final girl with telekinesis with emotinal baggage on the side is pretty daring. The actress Lars Park Lincoln did a strong performance. She captures the vunerability and intensity of the Tina character. Kevin Blair was also pretty great in his role. He's really good at playing the knight in shining armor and possibly one of the only sympatheic male leads in these movies. Not to mention how very enticing he is. There is nothing sexier than man going head to head with Jason Vorhees.
The scenes with Jason and my favorite final girl is classic. Tina even more badass than the final in the fourth movie because of course she has kick-ass pyschic powers that could take down a whole building. The final battle was indeed well done.
My last word is: A slasher classic with a good story and competent leading stars.

Hunk Of The Day: 80's edition

I am posting yet another 80's hunk for the day. And I will so kindly present to you.......

Jason Beghe from Monkey Shines. As you can see is looking dead sexy in that sweater. But just wait until you see him with his clothes off that'll be a real treat.....

Here is another sexy collage of this tempting hunk.....

A-mazing......wait there's more......

Talk about Bear! There is nothing more manly than a guy with a hairy chest with a great bod to go with that. this is truly my hunk of the 80's(Billy, don't worry you're still my number one). So take cover everybody before you swoon.

80's horror film reviews: Nightmare On Elm Street 4: The Dream Master

Yet another entry in the Nightmare Series. At first I was a little in between with this one. It definitely has a different tone than the first three films. It's more.....how can I say this.....cartoony? Not that I'm saying it's bad but some of the scenes puts the capital C into cheese. This definally has a more lighter not if comic book feel into the movie series and it got only worse with the rest(Dream child and Freddy's dead). But what I like about this is it's actually fun to watch. It's not scary but fun to watch though.
The story starts off with the three remaining survivors of the thrid film, Kristen, Joey and Kincad. When Kristen(played by the underused Tuesday Knight) is having the feeling that freddy is coming back to raise hell once again. When he finally succeds in killing the dream warriors including Kristen, Freddy sets his sights on Alice(Lisa Wilcox) who inherits Kristen's power after she's killed. Freddy not only has his eyes on Alice but her friends as well and it's up to her to stop him.
This mostly tells the story of Alice's inner strength and much more lengthy character development from shy, quiet girl to kick-ass action girl at the film's end. The acting of Lisa Wilcox is a little shaky at first but overall gives her character more competence. The acting of Tuesday Knight, however, is only ok. She seems to get strong in her role but ultimately falls flat a little at the end. For the rest, some were good, some were ok and some were underused. That is all.
The special effects are quite colorful, especially for a horror film. I felt like I was watching some afternoon kid's show but it doesn't really ruin the film as much, there quite good actually. Just to mention though, the kills are strangely bloodless for some reason. To the point where this were more appealing to kids around age 9 to 12 if they wanted to watch this.
Of course, this was the start of Freddy becoming something of a comedian of sorts. Which in my opinion, is not so good. Freddy is supposed to be dark and scary not happy and funny. Whatever writer or creator came up with this idea was pretty stupid if you asked me. The script was actually a lot more darker, even having a scary scene written there. But the executives made a one last decison and had a not-so scary horror film.
So my last word is: Fun to watch but lacks the spark that was the original

80's horror film reviews: Friday the 13th: Jason Lives

This is actually the most enjoyable movie of the series. The main fact is dosen't take itself seriously because...let's face it, it's a slasher film. So they bring up a notch and add more action, more body count and a little spice of horror references on the side. And you know I'm a huge friday the 13th fan.
So the story begins with Tommy(the yummy Thom Matthews) trying to put his demons to rest once and for all by going over to Jason's grave to burn him into dust. So along with the help of his friend, he tries to get the deed done, not until lighting strikes down on his bad luck(literally) and into Jason's corpse, reviving him, resulting him to rip Tommy's accomplice's heart when he wakes up.(gosh, Jason, what a way to say good morning). Tommy in a state of panic tries to warn the sheriff and his daughter that jason is out for blood just as he heads to a camp that was once called crystal lake.
The acting is actually good. Thom Matthews really gives a redeeming performance as Tommy, not to mention he's very easy on the eyes, Cute to boot. As for the final girl, she's something of a dim-wit. But of course that's supposed to be the film's gag since most of the final girls in these movies are smart and resourceful. Megan, not so much. Up until the end that is. As for the rest of the actors and characters, they're ok. There's not much to tell about them actually.
I'm so glad this movie dosen't use any nakedness as you might expect. Cause if all the friday movies used any of that, it would be down the road to exploitation. Just my opinon. But for one thing, they're not so easy on the kills let me tell you that. It is much more gorier and graphic than some of the earlier films in the series. Even though it's just another violent, bloody friday the 13th film, it's actually have a much lighter tone to it with a few touches of dark comedy in the mix. But what's smart about it is that they don't make it all over-the-top comedy just more subtle. The action in this is more jet-packed and pretty much more fun to watch with a more delicate pace. Definally a fun slasher treat.
So my last word is: A fun entertaining ride.

80's horror film reviews: Nightmare On Elm Street 2: Freddy's Revenge

Boy howdy. This movie was a hoot. It will be forever known as the gayest horror movie ever. This obviously sends out the message of gay panic in teens of the 80's, having a freddy as some kind of metaphor. The people who made this film had no idea how this was gonna turn out. Yeah, right.
The story is about Jesse, a boy who just moved into Nancy's house from the previous film. He keeps on having this weird that involves you-know-who and notices strange things about the house, all while he tries to deal with his apparent homosexuality that freddy manipulates with, even including killing the object of his affections(his coach and his best friend/potential lover). You know I'm joking on the homosexuality part. Just trying to make the story interesting. Oh and did I mention he has a big-nosed, annoying girlfriend that turns out to be our final girl. ugh.
The acting is pretty decent and the character of Jesse does seem sympatheic. I mean if you are a gay teen trying to come to terms with your sexuality while dealing a whiny girlfriend and having a secret crush on your male friend, you can't help but symapathize right?
If this wasn't a horror movie with no girls in what so ever, this would likely turn out to be an 80's gay porno. I'm mean you have an S&M bar, hot sweaty twink and stud types, sexually-agressive gym coach, etc. I could go on all day. The irony of this is that the lead actor is actually gay. This movie is definally a classic in my eyes.
So my last word is: A very interesting entry if you look at it in a different way.

Hunk Of The Day: 80's edition

Now here is an 80's edition for our Hunk Of The Day and surprise, surprise, our 80's Hunk Of The Day is......

Billy from Silent Night, Deadly Night. God, look at that gorgeous face. Wait there's more....

  This next picture would really make your skin sweat.....

Just pretend you're the girl being ravished by him, expect for the stabbing part(so unromantic). Just wait until you see him in his santa suit. Can anyone say fetish!

He is just too hot to be a serial killer......*sigh*

80's horror film reviews: Friday the 13th: The Final Chapter

You all know that i'm a huge friday the 13th fan and although i think of this as a teen sex comedy and horror film rolled into one, this has got to be one of the more fun addtion of the series. I don't know how many times i wacthed this when I was 11 or 12, about 50 I guess. You may think it's a stupid slasher with your average, idiotic teens going on a camp only to be killed brutally but it's one of the most entertaining movie of the bunch.
So the story is about siblings Trish and Tommy Jarvis vacationing with their mother all the while a group of dumb, rowdy teens is staying next door. So Jason comes along....and you know what happens.
What makes this movie so memorable is that it stars young Corey Feldman and a fresh-faced Crispin Glover before their big roles in The Goonies and Back To The Future, respectfully. Not only that but the bone-chilling death scenes that make this series so great. The story is simple which is the reason why I kept it short but what do you expect in the friday the 13th movies.
The acting is meh.....but I have to say that Kimberly Beck makes a bad-ass final girl. Her character goes through so much to outrun Jason even going so far as to crashing through a window and still going strong when Jason is at the back of her heel while holding her machette, telling him to bring it on. If that's not bad-ass I don't know what it is. As for Corey Feldman, he didn't do much until the final act. Seeing that bug-eyed look in his eye, he could play crazy really good.
I pretty much outgrown these movies a bit but it does give me good memories. I remember how fun it was when I catch a friday the 13th marathon on TV and watch it up until midnight. My most favorite one above this, hands down, is Friday the 13th: New blood that I will review later.
So my last word is: A bloody, cheesy funfest