Movie Review: Texas Chainsaw Massacre(2003)

Now I for one can't stand horror movie remakes. Some are ok while some are just awfully bad and contrived. So what started this whole movie remake trend? Whose stupid idea multiply this to a pulp? Well, it all started in 1998. Gus Van Sant decided to remake the 1960 classic Pshyco. It was marketed as this big slasher bloodfest because you know stuff like that was getting popular. When it theaters to an unexpected audience, moviegoers were not pleased and the movie did terribly because it was a shot-for-shot remake which was unnecessary. So there was no more re-doings for a while until in 2003 when New Line Cinema released the much anticipated The Texas Chainsaw Massacre reboot. It's a very grim psychological take on the  1974 shockfest. In my opinion, was a smart choice. To be honest, the original just seem like any other slasher film to me. It could be the scariest movie in the world but can it be for today's audiences? I don't think so. Because we've been there, done that. And the original Texas Chainsaw Massacre is looked as a typical slasher movie whereas the remake dwells more deeper into the cannibalistic family, marketing as pschyloical horror.
So here's the story: It's 1973, a group of young adults are on their way to a lynard skynard concert. They soon pick up a traumatized, shaken young woman from the off the roadway. She begs and warns them to turn around, when they refuse, the girl in immediate distress, shoots herself, leaving the group in shock and panic. Soon right after, they receive help from the sheriff, who's aggressive, demeaning behavior disturbs them. To make matters worse, while going to a family house, two of the group members are chased by a crazed maniac with a chainsaw. Erin is the only who breaks free from the attack while one of her friends is wounded and captured. It is only up to her to save her friends from the bloodied clutches of the crazed maniac known as leatherface and his cannibalistic Klan.
Jessica Biel blew me away, putting so much depth into her character, making her one of the most memorable final girls in horror films. Just like Eliza Dushku, her middle name shall be badass. She is truly the star of this movie. Jonathan Tucker was so adorable as the funny, dorky guy. It's a shame seeing him killed in such a brutal way. Erica Leershen is good in one of her breakout roles. Mike Vogel sure does have a body on him. All wet and sweaty. And that hair! those golden blond locks swishing. Oh yeah, his acting. Well, this was one of Mike Vogel's first feature films after his male modeling gig and I was pretty distracted by his good looks. But otherwise, he was good in this. Eric Balfour was actually good in his brief scenes too, before getting whacked, not to mention a total hottie.
The directing is very creative, making the lightings dark and moody which matched the tone of the film. The scenes were suspenseful, believe me or not. Intense and hair-raising to default. What was really smart, they kept the plot in the 70's, putting realism into the mix.
Just to let you know, this is Inspired by a true not based. It was just a marketing ploy to hype up the audience. Overall, this was one of the best horror remakes of the decade. But to add insult to injury, this movie was the reason why we have so many shitty remakes, so there is always an agree to disagree.
My Last Word: A total must see!

Happy Valentine's Day

Happy Valentine's Day! And do I have the surprise for you!

Hunk Of The Day: Micheal Fassbender

Our hunk of the day is the rising star of Inglourious Bastards, Fish Tank, Jane Eyre and Shame. He also plays one hot superhero. He is the ever so handsome....

Micheal Fassbender. Would you look at those eyes.....Mesmerizing! Wait, I would love to show you more....

Look at those pearly whites!

Dark and mysteriousss....

Boy Howdy! look at those biceps!

Let's see him shirtless shall we?

Money Shot!

So there you have it. A sexy, gorgeous hunk we would love to see more of. And just to let you know, those german eyes always get the mark.

Movie Review: Wrong Turn

Woah boy! This was definitely the movie to kick start the old school slasher genre. People were pretty smart about the marketing. You know in some movie trailer where they give out the shit right away, well in this one they don't exactly reveal the killers, it's only left to what you're guessing. Which is pretty cool, and that's what makes the movie scarier than it is.
So here's the story: A med school graduate is on his way to an interview, traveling way up to the smoky mountains of West Virginia. All of sudden, he crashes his car, colliding with a group of campers. Trapped in the middle of the wilderness, they try to find their way out only to come across some hungry hillbilly cannibals.
Eliza 'Badass' Dushku. That, is her new name. Boy, did she turn on the action as our honorary final girl. She was a tour de force. Desmond Harrington, gorgeous or what. Those intense blue eyes is his best acting features. *sigh* Jeremy Sisto. That curly hair. That handsome face. And he's such a sweet guy in this movie, so sad to see he didn't quite make it. And then there's his girlfriend with the annoying squeaky voice. Ugh. Good thing she got an axe right through her mouth. Oh but her actress was good by the way. Lindy Booth and Kevin Zegers we hardly knew ye.
Now let's get to the suspense scenes. Boy howdy, were they scary. But the one scene that was really hair-raizing was the escape scene, which is truly the most suspenseful ever. And the group watching their friend get eaten. Total frightfest there.
The story worked well like any slasher story. A group of friends get trapped in the woods but having two story arcs in the mix is second best.
Wow. Just wow. It's certainly a horror movie to watch. Great chase scenes, lots of gore, not so much character development but who cares, that's what old school slashers are made for.
My last word: A slasher funfest

Movie Review: Jeeper Creepers 2

To my knowledge this movie didn't deserve a sequel. But I'm not saying this is terrible. It's actually good and captures the suspense of the first film. But having a movie with this many characters and actually have the real main characters show up at the end is.....a problem. the pacing can be a bit slow sometimes and being trapped in a bus can be a vaulable time waster.
So here's the story: while going on a bus trip, a high school basketball team and it's cheerleaders get trapped in the middle of nowhere while the unforseen creature hungers for blood. Meanwhile a grieving father plans his revenge on the creature who killed his son. The kids must fight for survival just when the farmer take charge on his supernatural rival.
There was just so many characters I just can't catch up with who. I don't even know who the main characters are. There's two arcs in one story and it's hard to seperate the two. But otherwise, the acting is good.
Having two arcs in one story can be a bit of problem, however, it blended in well with the pacing and suspense scenes in tow.
As you know in sequels, they pretty much hyped up the action and body count. Which is kind of fun and at the edge of your seat.
So there you have it, a fun scary sequel that's pretty watchable.
My last word: An immense thrill ride.

Movie Review: Jeeper Creepers

Finally! A horror film that know it's horror! Suspenseful chase scenes, Cringe-worthy death scenes, and moments that will jump you right out of your seat. Back in the scream generation hey days of the late 90's, filmmakers wanted to make something different for their teenage audience. A homicidal maniac killing random kids was getting kind of old. So they decided to push more on the supernatural side of things with films like disturbing behavior, the falcalty, The rage: carrie 2 etc. None of those were successful until 2001when director Victor Salva released Jeepers Creepers which brought back old school horror in a new light.
So here's the story: Siblings Trish and Darry decide to travel cross country on spring break. Little do they know a unknown maniac with a monster truck is terrorizing them. All through the day and all  through the night, the brother and sister duo try their best to fight off this psycho who is....not quite human...
Gina Phillips was fantastic. Playing a final girl who is strong, smart, and resourceful to the craziness around her. She handled it perfectly well. *sigh* Justin Long. Not only is he cute, he really did struck my heart with his realistic protrayal. Cute and funny Justin Long. It's a shame he didn't live in the end. The character of Jezel was actually a deconstructed version of the crazy eledery person in these movies. She admits it's not easy dealing with visions involving monsters killing and eating people. That's what makes the character so real. then we have a cameo by Ellen Bernnan. And just like any well-known actor transtioning to horror films, she hams it up in hams town.
The story worked wonderfully with the pacing and scenes. By golly were they suspenseful! The creeper was defintely creepy and the gore and effects worked perfectly.
A great horror film that brings back the old school feel to shock a new generation of audiences.
My last word: A definite must see!

Movie Review: Seed Of Chucky

This movie was a hoot! I had never laughed so hard at how bad this movie is. But for some strange reason I had fun watching this. Don't get me wrong, this movie is totally shitty but it's one those bad movies you can watch on a rainy day.
So here's the story: Little baby Chucky is all grown up and is now living in london with an abusive ventriloquist. He sees his biological parents on t.v. and decides to escape from the viscious ventriloquist and travels to los angeles where Chucky and Tiffany are shooting a movie which so happens to star Jennifer Tilly, Tiffany's favorite actress. Oh yes, let's get to Jennifer Tilly, an actress so desprate to stay thin, so desprate to be on screen again, she attempts to sleep with Redman, who is making this soon-to-be fiasco. Meanwhile, Chucky's offspring, so excited he have found his parents, revives them in a vodoo ritual. He soon reveals himself to them, to Chucky's shock. Since he really doesn't have a name, Chucky decides to name him Glen while Tiffany perfers Glenda. Together, Tiffany and Chucky tries to show Glen or Glenda the ropes of killing, who is pretty much repressed about it. All the while Jennifer is trying to revive her career in the midst of murders happening around Tinsletown.
Ugh! where to begin. Poor Jennifer Tilly. She just can't catch a break. All I see her in is these awfully cheesy movies and this one pretty much takes the cake. A once promising actress with an oscar nommination is now stuck doing relentlessly bad movies. She would be a great comedian though. Can Redman even act? i just don't get it. How High wasn't that great and he had a failed tv show. This movie seems to be the end of his acting career. Hannah Spirit from SClub7 was actually good in this. Too bad she gets to be in this horrid movie and was one of the more decent characters that was brutally murdered for no good reason.
The story and execution could've been better than it was. And there had to be some reason to show Jennifer Tilly's face in this movie as Jennifer Tilly. She could've been better off in a cameo. This seems to be the nail in the coffin for her career. And when an oscar-winning actress decides to play in an down and out slasher film, especially as herself, she positively won't be taken seriously in hollywood until one or two good movies would save her from being laughed at. I like Jennifer Tilly, don't get me wrong, she just needs to try more different things. Being a scream queen is fun and all but going on different ventures could make her a more versatile actress.
Just like the last one, the deaths are more gory and elaborate. Oh wait! was that John Waters? Oh too bad his face was half gone. And what was with the Britney Spears death scene. Totally unnecessary.
There's just nothing I can say about this. It's a bad film that should've gotten less hollywood cameos. But you can sit and watch with friends to have a good laugh at it.
My Last Word: Watchable, but don't hold your breath.