Movie Review: Prom Night (2008)

 It's a rarity when you have a PG-13 movie these days. People are so eager to amp up the sex and violence just get an R-rating and it's so desperate to me. As I said before, I'm not the biggest gorehound or don't particularly care for sex and nudity in horror films. To me, horror should rely on suspense and playing with your fears. But when a certain movie seems to be lacking that, there's really nothing to fall back on. In the mid to late 2000's, there have been a few PG-13 teen horror films that have been lackluster at best. And it's only a marketing ploy for teens and tweens to ramp up the box office. Prom Night is one of those movies. It became sort of a trend when movies that happen to have the same name, the same plot, the same idea of a decade old horror film yet is a completely different movie. This didn't have to be named Prom Night but people were so eager to make comparisons anyway. When there really shouldn't be. Okay to make this quick, it did have a promising opening scene, Brittany Snow does at least try to put in a good performance with special mention going to the very sexy Idris Elba, and it did have one good suspenseful chase scene. But all that doesn't make up for a terrible script and Prom Night ends up being a run-of-the-mill forgettable teen horror film.
The Story: Typical ordinary teenager Donna experiences a night of terror and tragedy when her family is murdered right before eyes at the hands of her psychotic teacher Mr. Fenton, who is infatuated with her. Years later at the eve of her Senior Prom, the past comes back to haunt her, literally, when the mentally unbalanced Mr. Fenton, who just escaped from prison, begins hunting down her friends one by one.

The acting wasn't bad, it was more average to passable if you ask me. The actors were good with what they were given, although the character development seemed to be lacking. Okay, in the original the characters weren't what I call nice but at least they were a lot interesting than our main cast here. They're just so...bland. And I will use that very often.

Brittany Snow as Donna was one of the actors that at least tried. And although it's not one of her strongest efforts, she gives an acceptable performance.

The character of Donna I could fall back on because She's the only character with any proper character development. I get that she went through a traumatic ordeal but if the filmmakers would've went further through that and how it deeply affected her I think the movie would've been slightly better for it, instead of some cheap plot point to add story to the script.

There could be more to Donna, however, she's nothing more than a typical final girl.

Johnathan Schaech as Mr. Fenton was mostly forgettable. Okay, just to get this out of the way, Johnathan Schaech is a very sexy man but he is totally miscast in this role. The filmmakers could've cast someone more intimidating, more scary. Maybe having a less attractive actor would've help too.

On top of that, Mr. Fenton has a terrible disguise. He just strolls in his killing spree, with a hat and a knife. Really? Really? And what makes it worse, the police are totally oblivious to this guy who only wears a hat. Do you see how stupid and convoluted this movie is? If they would've went with the ski mask-all black ensemble, I could totally buy that. But the whole Joe Schmoe-with-a-hat is what they went with. This has got to be one of the lamest horror villains in slasher history. Not crafty, not clever, yet he can still outsmart the cops.

Speaking of cops, we have Idris Elba as Detective Winn. This is one of Idris Elba's notable early roles and he does a good job, not much is given in his part but he does his best. As far as the character of Detective Winn, he is surely incompetent. Him and his entire police force are probably the dumbest law enforcement I've ever witnessed. And as much of the slasher movies I've seen, that's saying something. Gosh! These guys are useless. Of course, Detective Winn comes in and saves the day but it doesn't get him off the hook at being horrible at his job.

Okay, I'm going to run through Donna's friends. Since there is no character development, this will be easy peasy:

First we have Donna's very hot handsome boyfriend Bobby but with good looks, there is no personality. He is so bland I can't even have a full description of him.

Then we have Claire played by Jessica Stoup, who was last seen in the horrible The Hills Have Eyes 2, has nothing to work with here. She does seem to have promise as an actress but for all I've seen her in she is given wasteful material which indeed wastes her talent.

The sexy Kelly Blatz is also mishandled as Claire's disgruntled boyfriend and throughout the movie that's all the couple do is bicker like a married couple. Kelly Blatz, to be honest, isn't really that strong of an actor but at least he's cute, right?

Lisa and Ronnie played by Dana Davis and Collins Pennie are the cute high school couple who decides to consummate their love on Prom Night but since this is a slasher movie, you know what happens.

There are actually two scenes I found suspenseful. First, there is the opening scene that shows some promise, though, it could've been done better.  Lisa's chase scene was actually well done but nowhere near as thrilling as the 1980 original. That's all I got, the rest of the movie pretty much falls flat.
How does one make a PG-13 slasher movie? No really I want to know. I....just don't know what to say. Now this is what I call an unnecessary horror remake and it just gets worse further down the line in the coming reviews. As a whole this is a pretty shitty movie that has nothing to offer. It's a typical bubblegum pop teeny-booper slasher film that tries to be hip, but failing miserably. As a verdict, I will go with the Jamie Lee Curtis original. To be fair the 1980 film, may not be up to par with Halloween or Friday The 13th, though at least it has the right ingredients of a great slasher and at least it's ENTERTAING. But this is a waste of time and a terribly written mess.
My Last Word: The original is way more of a night to remember than this forgettable trash.

 

Movie Review: April Fools Day

 Boy howdy, this movie was a waste of my time and three dollars. Yes, I said three dollars. But there is a dime a dozen where I fall into a direct-to-DVD crap like this. And this movie isn't even WORTH a dime.
I really didn't see what was the point of remaking the 1986 original. I guess because back then, everybody was so put off by the "shock" ending, forgetting that it's actually an affectionate parody of the slasher genre. The movie had since been admirable and became something of a cult classic. I never thought in a million years they would redo this. First of all, what would be the overall tone of the movie? Would it be a horror-comedy or would it be straightforward? And surprise, surprise, they were going to go with the straightforward approach. Even though the final result of the movie is unintentionally hilarious at best. But let's just be glad that it has nothing to do with the original. It just so happens to be a movie with the same name as the 1986 slasher. I'll just leave it at that because there's just nothing else to say about this movie except that it's piece of crap.
The story: A group of narcissistic, self-indulgent, self-righteous, egotistical, arrogant, pompous rich snobs decide to pull a prank on a girl which ends disastrously, resulting in her death. A year later, the group receives death threats and are always watching over their shoulders, anticipating of whoever is preparing to strike.

There's one comparison I like to point out: The characters in the original were actually likeable. Say what you want about the 1986 film but I liked it because of that. Now we have a bunch of egotistical assholes who have nothing but scorn against each other. Now I'm only going to focus on three main characters because the rest are just cliché: You have the arrogant politician, the narcissistic beauty queen, the annoying, obnoxious dimwit who always carries a camera with him, etc. So I think the characters that have the most development will get most of the luck.

We have Desiree Cartier awfully played by Taylor Cole is a raging bitch when we first meet her, treating everybody, including her friends like shit.

And even a year later after the accident, she still is a bitch. I don't care how the movie at least make her sympathetic, it just doesn't work for me. If you have a main character that's this selfish and unlikeable, you bound to not care what happens to her.

Then we have Desiree's womanizing, party boy brother Blaine played by the hunky, sexy Josh Henderson. Just like good o'l sis, Blaine is a giant asshole, particularly the type of guy that would have sex with anything with a pulse. Even after he tricked a girl and caused her death, he gets no consequences. He has some remorse for sure but what do we know, he has money and good looks and in the end, he doesn't quite care.

Torrance played by the atrocious Scout-Taylor Compton is an upcoming Hollywood starlet, how ironic. This cites Scout's second ride down the remake train, though I would say, she fist right at home into direct-to-video land. Okay, more on her character, she was obviously best friends with the girl before the group accidently murdered her. It's strange how she still friends with these people when she could've steered clear away from them. However, she puts her so-called acting skills to good use later in the movie.
Suspense? what suspense? and the death scenes are really lame and tame. For all I know this movie could've been rated PG13 or even worse PG.

And there is at least one special effect I would like to highlight where in the opening scene when the girl falls over the balcony, you can tell it's a dummy in plain sight. It's so hilarious it has to be seen to be believed.
Okay there is a twist and if you haven't seen the original you would probably know by now:
Everybody Lives! But unlike the original where it was a lighthearted prank by the friends who was doing for a test for the vacation lodge, in this version, it's a mean-spirited one put on Desiree because of how much a total jerk she was to everybody. So Torrance is holding a gun, it may seem fake but once she takes a shot at Desiree to show it's fake, it suddenly blow Desiree's brains out. Everybody freaks out. End of film. There is a alternate ending where after Desiree dies, Blaine gets thewill and drives off victoriously. You know, I'll just stick with the original ending, cause not just the audience loses, EVERYBODY DOES.
When I look at this, this isn't a horror film, it's nothing more than a basic teen soap opera. Hell, the production of the movie looked like it was made as a pilot movie. With your basic daytime soap opera lighting. And your basic daytime soap opera music. I mean the original wasn't much of a horror film but it least it had the mechanics of one.
Please guys don't check out this movie, it's a total bore. I don't even have to tell you the verdict. Go watch the original, it has likeable characters, good atmosphere, and it's actually fun to watch.
My last word: AVOID THIS.

 

Happy 30th Anniversary To NOES 2

Yesterday was the 30th Anniversary of A Nightmare On Elm Street 2, if any of you know. I wouldn't say this a great movie, but it's an enjoyable watch, especially if you're gay. Be sure to check on the documentary Scream Queen starring the one and only Mark Patton, coming in 2016.