Wednesday, January 11, 2012

Movie Review: House Of Wax

This wasn't exactly bad. Yes, it's a bit campy and yeah, the characters are kind of dull but I releatively enjoyed this. Now for one thing, I'm not saying this is great or anything but there were some fantastic suspenseful scene that really stood the movie out.
So here's the story: Six twentysomethings: Kimberly from 24, Sam from Supernatural, Lucas from One Tree Hill, Some annoying guy with a camera, The almighty Paris Hilton, and that guy from One on One, camp out in a deserted wooded area while making their trip to a football game. They are soon visciously attacked by two deranged twins who after they've killed their victims, mold them into wax. Therefore, only two can survive their deadly game.
There would be a reason why I didn't say the character's names. There really wasn't much to tell about them. They were just cardboard cutouts though the acting overshadowed that. But only with the two leads. Elisha Cuthbert was actually good. She took the final girl role and rolled with it smoothly. Chad Micheal Murray. Mmmm......Chad Micheal Murray. Not only was he great at playing the bad boy, he looked good playing the part, too. Good gravy, did you see those abs? Hunk Alert! Oh also I'll be glad to mention the tall, dark, and handsome Jared Padalecki. Not much to his character but damn, did he look sexy. Now let's get to the queen of media Paris Hilton. It's not anything to say about her. She seemed kind of bored. There was no depth to her character other than just being a glassy-eyed bimbo. But for one thing, it was kind of disrespectful having a camcorder follow her around, given the fact this was right around her sex tape scandal. Nothing to say about the other actors. More like props if you ask me. Just an annoying guy with a camera and the primadonna's jock boyfriend.
One special note, did the killers look hot or what. Why do the hottest men in horror films go crazy? It's beyond me.
There were a couple of scenes that really stood out like movie theater scene which was awesome and suspenseful. And I must confess, Paris Hilton's death scene was quite hair-rasing and believeable.
Though may I must add three more points to Elisha. The girl can throw a mean baseball hit.
The pacing was meh. The normal timing rate for a slasher film is about 85 to 90 minutes But when I found out this was about two hours, I thought, boy a movie that long has to have a story to it. The story was actually good. The whole good twin/bad twin anatomy had a great symbolic touch to it.
So, although it was a little campy, I quite enjoyed this. It keeps you interested and on the edge of your seat. But they could've developed the characters way much better than they were.
My last word is: A fun thrill ride for any slasher fan to enjoy.

Thursday, January 5, 2012

Movie Review: Scream 4




I certianly enjoyed this sequel. I like how they still kept the witty dialouge and the genre savvy techniques fresh, especially when it comes to horror movies these days which is filled with pointless reimaginings and prequel/sequels. Scream 4, however, does a good job at rehashing the feel of the first film and then turning it into something completely different in the second act, which would be a definite spoiler for you folks out there, so keep in check.
Now here's the story: During a book tour for her autobiographical novel, Sidney Prescott returns to her hometown and back to the skeletons in her closet. Her two partners in crime-fighting are having fairly normal lives. Dewy is now sherrif and Gale, who was best-known for writing non-fiction, is now writing just fiction. Meanwhile, there is a new batch of characters along the way: Kirby, the horror movie fangirl, Oliva, the beauty queen, Charlie and Robbie, two horror movie enthusasists, and Jill, Sidney's long distant cousin, who is also having relationship issues with her boyfriend, Trevor. Just then, two teenage girls have been burtally murdered, stirring up the town's paranoia. The plot thickens when Jill recieves a phone call from the killer prompting Sidney, Dewy, and Gale to face the battle at hand yet again.
I liked how they kept the story fresh yet subtle. The opening scene was really cool. Jumping from movie to movie was totally inventive. Although the film was quite suspenseful and entertaining, it felt a bit rushed. There were some characters who were killed without us even knowing them. Oh yes, the characters, let's get to them. I mostly suggest the more memorable ones. First let's start with Hayden Panettiere's lovable performance as Kirby. She was a spitfire of a vixen and it would've been cool if she was the film's final girl. she knows her way around horror films, why not have her as one. Then there's the lovely Marley Shelton as deputy Judy Hicks. Her character was all but cute and quirky, though a little weird, I still love her for it. How can I not mention the blue-eyed cutie Rory Culkin as Charlie. His performance was so adorable I couldn't help but blush. Too bad he's one of the main killers though.
Emma Roberts pretty much blew me away. Boy, can she amp up the crazy or what? From being the sweet, shy, supposed final girl to being the knife-wielding, blood-thirsty bitch-on-wheels was clever twist. Damn you Jill Roberts you fooled us all. And boy, did she wanted to steal the crown from Sidney, queen of the final girls. What was even more hiliarious was her self-harming scene. Gosh, this girl is fucking dedicated.
As always there is our herioc trio, Neve Campbell, David Arquette, and Courtney Cox, especially Courtney Cox, who is stunning and powerful as ever. Sidney, you will be dear to my heart as a kickass final girl. Dewy is as sympathic as he once was before but more resilant and strong-willed.
The directing is, of course, suspenseful and the edge-your-seat inducing, although the editing was a bit shaky. Overall, the movie was pretty good. Now, I'm not saying this was a masterpeice but it's better than most horror movies these days which the creators are so intent on remaking these films. This addition is sort of an 'F' you to them all.
My Last Word: With it's mix of dark humor and horror, this movie is definitely a watch.

Wednesday, January 4, 2012

Very Long Break

Sorry for the long delay, folks. I've just been really busy with working on new novels and creating short stories, I just didn't have the time to blog and internet went out for a while but I'll be sure to update new reviews and other pop culture treats soon...happy new year!

Sunday, September 11, 2011

The Many Loves Of Batman

Boy, Batman sure does have a thing for blondes.






But I think Brunettes are more of his thing for the darker, edgier crowd....


Wednesday, September 7, 2011

The Not So Movie Review: Shark Night and The 3D fad Going to Waste






I have heard a lot of despicable reviews about this movie and there for I will not until the light of day, see this movie. My expections of horror movies these days, especially 3D ones are a bit low, although they are still high for some I haven't seen yet. But now that I've read about this movie, I'll take the smart movie by not seeing it. From what I heard, this is a cliche piece of garbage with your regular cast of idiot young characters. Sad to say this wasn't even screened for critics which is good for them.
But enough about this movie, let's talk about the recent fad in 3D. Sure it's cool. Sure it's fun. But this shit is really getting old. I know I don't have a right to talk crap about 3D movies because I haven't even experienced one but the real reason is that mostly absurd horror movies get the 3D effect. Some movies are decent but some are just too ridiculous. This is why people are so interested in having things throwing at their faces than the plot of the story, just like focusing on the hot cast or the blood and gore. Yeah it may have a whole of man candy and 'stunning' visuals but it will never make a good story what's so ever as people are just wasting their money.
It just comes to show how hollywood will do anything to make that extra buck by putting out tasteless drecks like this. But hopefully more interesting and percised horror movies will come along but with a little subtly on the side....

Thursday, September 1, 2011

Birthday Girl Part 1

Lighting Flashes
 
A car is driving erratically through the bridge in a nasty strom. Inside the car, a MAN in his early 40's, looking on to a birthday present. He tries to seek out the window through the heavy rain. The present suddenly slips under the passanger seat. When the man tries to gets it, the car swirves, crashing at the side of the bridge, deep into the water(in slow motion)
FADE OUT
FADE IN
A close up on a woman's burning ciggarette.....
ANGELA, a woman in her late 30's with bottle blond hair and cat green eyes, is waiting for her husband to get home. She sists at the dining table with her daughter, CASSIE, who's about to turn 12 years old. She has dark blond and seems to have her mother's eyes but mixes in with blue like her father's. She sits there in worry.
 
 
ANGELA
He should be here by now.
 
She has a bottle in her hand and takes a swig.
 
CASSIE(tries to smile)
It's okay, Mom. Just as long as we're here together...that's all I could wish for.
 
Angela smiles warmly. She playfully pinches Cassie on the cheek.
 
ANGELA
You'll always be my special little girl.
 
There's a knock on the door.
ANGELA
This better be him.
 
 
Angela opens the door. Two police officers are standing there. Angela has a concerned look on her face.
 
ANGELA
Yes?
Cassie peeks behind the door.
 
POLICE OFFICER #1
We're sorry to inform....(fades away)
 
From Cassie's POV, Angela breaks down and begins sobbing incoherently.
 
 
ANGELA(sobs)
No! No! No! No! No!......
 
Cassie walks up to her mother, softly rubbing her back.
 
 
CASSIE
What's wrong, mom?
 
Angela turns around. Her tearstricken face filled with ruined mascara. She hugs Cassie and begins to whisper in her ear. Tears starts running in Cassie's eyes. She lets out an emotionally-filled scream.
 
CREDITS ROLL IN
 
INT. SCHOOL- CAFETERIA
CASSIE, now a stoic 17 year old is staring blankly across the cafeteria room thoughtfully, barely eating her food.
From the table across from her sits,
KATRINA(18), JANESSA(17), COREY(18) and COLIN(18). KATRINA has similar features as Cassie except her eyes are hazel. She strikes death glares at her while Cassie has her mind elsewhere. She walks up to her table, along with her posse. Katrina slams her hand on the table, agressively. Her eyes are intense.
 
KATRINA
What are you staring at?
 
CASSIE
I don't know. Just staring.
 
KATRINA
Don't try and fool me. I don't know what goes inside that head of yours but from my sense, you were staring directly at me for some odd reason.
 
CASSIE
Oh, is this because I almost fucked your boyfriend?
 
 
Katrina narrows her eyes.
 
KATRINA(Angrily)
You do anything to spit that up in my face.
 
Katrina gets close at Cassie face.
 
KATRINA
You listen here. You are nothing but a patheic peice of shit. And I advise you to go fuck off.
 
Katrina slides Cassie's food tray to the floor. She walks off, giving her an evil stare. While the rest of the group give her pitying looks. Colin gives her an exaggerated puck on the lips.
Cassie knells down on the splattered floor and cleans it up.
CUT TO:
INT. SCHOOL-OUTSIDE-SIDEWALK
The cloud is heavy with light rain. Just a few blocks from the school, Cassie is standing on the sidewalk, wearing her gray hoddie over her head. She looks up at the overcast sky then looks down and pulls out something in her pocket. It's a switchblade. She flings it open, admiring it, feeling the tip of the blade. She looks at the carving at the end: PROPERTY OF JAKE MCMILLAN
 
FEMALE VOICE
What are doing?
 
Cassie snaps out of her reverie and bring her attention to DANIELLE(17), a cute girl with an all-american look, holds an umbrella in her hand. She looks at Cassie, quizzically but with a smile on her face.
DANIELLE(surprised)
Is that a knife?
CASSIE
It used to be my Dad's.
Danielle winces, expressing sympathy in her eyes.
DANIELLE
So, what are you doing, today?
CASSIE
I gotta go visit my mom at the hospital. I haven't seen her two weeks.
DANIELLE
Yeah. I know how that is.....
Cassie
Well, it's time for me to go
DANIELLE
Wait, Cassie. About today at lunch...I know you and Katrina don't really...(beat) mesh well together....
CASSIE
I know what you're gonna say. It's not my fault that girl holds grudges against people.
DANIELLE
If you would just even stuff out with her, maybe things won't be so erupt between you two.
CASSIE
I Think it's beyond what me and Eric did to her.
DANIELLE
Cassie...Her and Eric aren't together anymore.
CASSIE
Because of me I know.
Danielle walks up to Cassie and takes her hand, affectionately.
DANIELLE
Cassie....
The two girls hug, having a little moment together.
CASSIE
I'll be seeing you
DANIELLE
You call me and tell me how things are going, okay?
CASSIE
I will
Cassie goes down the street as the rain goes from light to heavy.
CUT TO:
 
INT. CASSIE'S HOUSE- BEDROOM
Cassie sits on the bed, staring at a book. It's a well-known novel, Jane Eyre, one of Cassie's favorites. She holds the book in her chest in reminisce.
*FLASHBACK*
INT. Unknown Bridge
On a stormy, rainy night. Three cars are gathered up at a broken-down bridge. Two policemen hook a chain to a battered up car that is floating atop of a deep watery mess.
CUT TO:
The policemen go inside the soggy insides of the car. The flashlight on a man's pale dead body(maggots, leeches all over him, bugs crawling out of his mouth). One policeman pulls out a soggy red present. He rips it out to reveal a copy of Jane Eyre.
FLASH CUT:
BACK TO PRESENT-CASSIE'S HOUSE- BEDROOM
Cassie blinks. Tears are rolling down her eyes. There's a heavy knock on the door, snapping Cassie out of the memory.
A slim, middle-aged woman appears at the door. She is known as Cassie's aunt, KATHY.
KATHY
Sweety, it's time to go see your mother.
CUT TO:
INT. CLEARBROOK PSYCHIATRIC HOSPITAL
Cassie and Kathy follow a doctor through the flourescent-lit hallways, to an isolated lounge room with a few mental paients play recreational activites. Cassie holds a wrap of flowers and walks up to a lone woman, sadly staring at the window. The woman turns around, giving Cassie a sad smile. It is soon come into notion the woman is Cassie's Mom, ANGELA.
CASSIE(holding back emotion)
Hey mom.(lays the flowers on Angela's lap) It's Cassie. We haven't seen each other for a long time, haven't we?
DOCTOR(talking to Kathy)
She still tramuatized by the year-long effect from the guilt she'd been having since the accident.
KATHY
Will she have any progress?
DOCTOR
I'm not sure but a little more of psychoanalyzing will help cope with her memory.
Cassie holds her mother's hand tightly, tears coming down her eyes.
CASSIE
You'll get out, mom. I promise you. You'll get out.
Andrea squeezes her hand back, her eyes watering with despair.

Now to present to you.....


Birthday Girl
Written By
J.D. Alexander